Covers.com asked Twitter for the "sketchiest" places it had ever placed a bet. The answers were ... something.
Covers.com is not a person. It is a website that pulls together the various betting lines on various sporting events, although we might as well presume that it was one of the people that works at that website who took to Twitter earlier this week with a seemingly innocuous question.
#CoversContest What's the dodgiest/sketchiest spot you've ever placed a sports bet? Best answer wins some Covers gear pic.twitter.com/1wRnomPdwV
— Covers (@Covers) September 24, 2014Generally, this sort of #brand-to-human communication comes off uncanny and sort of wrong, landing on a vibe something like a Stop&Shop self-checkout station attempting to make Siri-voiced small talk about Derek Jeter. In this case, though, the question asked by a gambling website's Twitter elicited a series of beguiling, weird, intermittently very depressing, and otherwise extremely human responses.
@Covers#coverscontest ditched my wife on our anniversary vacation in the "Ripley's Believe it or Not" museum to fake a poop. Bet lost.
— Brandon Morris (@BCMorris917) September 24, 2014@Covers I bet a 2H while simultaneously trying to talk police officers on 14th street out of giving my friend a ticket for public urination
— Matty £. A. (@poloshot) September 24, 2014@Covers 6 cans of tuna to win 5 on the Bucs to win the super bowl over the raiders in the Sheridan Oregon Federal Prison
— Tim (@vegastbone) September 24, 2014@Covers In an NCAA student-athlete "no-gambling" seminar
— Chicago Degen (@washeduptourpro) September 24, 2014@Covers grandfathers funeral. At the cemetery.. In the rain under umbrella .. Kneeling down behind the limo so no one would see. N I lost.
— Mike Aiosa (@Calzone1006) September 24, 2014@Covers at all you can eat Chinese buffet, my phone fell in the plum sauce so i grabbed it with my hand and finished the bet dripping sauce
— HIGHStakes (@HIGHStakes5) September 24, 2014@Covers during a job interview. I acted like I was taking notes and made the bet. I got the job! And more importantly won the bet!!
— Andrew Misiak (@216andrew) September 24, 2014@Covers Tommy's Hickman Pub. It's closed now because of all the shootings.
— Ryen (@RyenInTheMoines) September 24, 2014If this sort of virtual human/brand interaction is what The Singularity is going to look like, let's at least give it points for being honest about being a terrible husband and having done federal time in Oregon.